SmartCollegeVisit is on Facebook!
Join our Fan Page to connect with old and new friends. We invite you to share what you like with your Facebook Friends, too!
From the Heliparent to the Free-Range Parent What's the midway point between overparenting and free-range parenting? This article from Time Magazine gives us a look at where we've come from to where we are now.
Helicopter Parents: The Backlash Against Overparenting - TIME
The insanity crept up on us slowly; we just wanted what was best for our kids. We bought macrobiotic cupcakes and hypoallergenic socks, hired tutors to correct a 5-year-old's "pencil-holding deficiency," hooked up broadband connections in the treehouse but took down the swing set after the second skinned knee. We hovered over every school, playground and practice field — "helicopter parents," teachers christened us, a phenomenon that spread to parents of all ages, races and regions. Stores began marketing stove-knob covers and "Kinderkords" (also known as leashes; they allow "three full feet of freedom for both you and your child") and Baby Kneepads (as if babies don't come prepadded). The mayor of a Connecticut town agreed to chop down three hickory trees on one block after a woman worried that a stray nut might drop into her new swimming pool, where her nut-allergic grandson occasionally swam. A Texas school required parents wanting to help with the second-grade holiday party to have a background check first. Schools auctioned off the right to cut the carpool line and drop a child directly in front of the building — a spot that in other settings is known as handicapped parking.
continute at www.time.com
Student Panel Highlight of Radford Open HouseRadford University, located in Radford, Virginia, hosted a fall Open House program on November 14, 2009. The event filled the auditorium at Preston Hall. Dr. Steven Nape, vice provost, welcomed the families and led the presentation and Q&A. He was assisted by two admissions counselors. Together, they delivered a fine overview of RU that was warm and real. This approach carried over to the panel of five students who talked about where they came from and why they chose RU. They were all enthusiastic proponents of life at Radford and, at the same time, came across as honest and sincere. Their answers to some questions drew laughs from the audience. Their insights to life "on your own" included things like having to be responsible for getting up in time for an 8 o'clock class and having to clean your own bathroom. They discussed managing money and involvement in student clubs and, of course, the food.
The student interaction was eye opening for the two teens I brought on the tour. They came away with the feeling that Radford University held possibilities and opportunities for them. They were relieved by the programs at the school to help with the transition to college and the lack of pressure to choose a major right away.
I mentioned in an earlier post on SmartCollegeVisit that we already "knew" Radford from having attended performances and galleries. We all realized that we really did not "know" the school, but having visited, we now know more and want to know even more.
The purpose of a college visit is to get a feel for life on that particular campus and to determine whether or not life there is a good fit. A tour of campus and a visit to the dorm, and even eating on campus can provide a snapshot of a day in the life of a college student, but if you don't take the time to visit a class, then you'll miss out on a great learning opportunity.
All it takes is a little additional planning to work attending a class into your day on campus. Here are some tips to help you out:
- Arrangements to visit a class (or two) should be made in about two weeks in advance by contacting the academic department or adviser that houses the major of interest.
- Make plans to visit on weekdays when classes are in session. Avoid scheduling your visit during exam weeks or on reading days (the days prior to the start of exams).
- Ask for the name of the instructor or professor and location of the classroom.
- Arrive early or plan to stay after class so you'll have a chance to meet the instructor in person.
- If you don't plan to stay for the entire class period, then sit near the door so you can leave without disruption.
If there are major facilities related to the major, such as labs, rehearsal halls, galleries, etc, then make arrangements to add these to your tour stops as well. For a parent's perspective on the importance of visiting a class while on campus, please read Go With Class(es), published 11//05/09 on SmartCollegeVisit.
***
Lisa Warren contributed to this post.
The HeliparentHello, my name is Kelly and I'm a helicopter parent.
While I don't manage every aspect of my children's lives, I know I've been a pushy mom when it comes to encouraging them to take certain steps in school that should help them when the time comes to apply to college. It's really hard not to be that way--partly because of how my parents raised me, partly because we live in a college town where everybody's life is impacted by what goes on at the university, and partly because of the career path I've chosen. Poor kids. I've worked with colleges for 16 years which means they've been hearing about college admissions since they were born.
I'd like to think I'm a "recovering" helicopter parent--that I've reached that place where I've realized my kids really don't need to me to hover (not that they ever did). Having just returned from visiting a college with my teen, I had to smile at the way some of the students on the panel responded to the question "What was your biggest adjustment when you came to college?" One student said "having to wake up on my own and I had three 8 o'clock classes!" Another said "cleaning the bathroom -- there's no cleaning lady on campus -- you're the cleaning lady!" A third said "managing money." While I think I've already covered those topics in my "tell you-everything-you-need-to-know-for-the-rest-of-your-life" approach to parenting, really only time and experience (their's, not mine) will tell. I hope I've reached that point where roar of the helicopter is a sound they hear only in the distance and not overhead.
A Tale of Two Colleges There's an old saying that goes "You never get a second chance to make a first impression." That's certainly true when it comes to the college visit. For the school, it's often a make or break opportunity. The story below comes from Susan in South Carolina.
Susan's Story
I took my daughter to visit two universities. One was a 4-year, out of state school, approximately 2.5 hours away and the other a local 4-year school. The visit was revealing. Although both schools were on beautiful campuses and were known for the major my daughter wanted to pursue, the similarities ended there.
At the out of state school, the staff was not friendly, their overview movie didn't work. We sat in a room with 20-plus other families but no one spoke to us why they were scrambling to get the video to work (it never did) and they had to call the students who failed to show up to give the tour. Other than the tour guide, we did not interact with any students or participate in any other activities. We saw old buildings which were not updated and a tiny dorm room. The one faculty member we spoke with briefly in the major was not optimistic about the program or the school. I felt like an unexpected, unwelcome intruder.
At the other school, the red carpet was rolled out. Students were welcomed with a banner, multiple student interaction, question and answer opportunities. We had time with administration and students, and the school and room tour. The movie that worked and the campus had been readied for our arrival.
The price tag on the sloppily presented school is 10K less than the other school. The visits flipped my daughter's first and second place choices. I can't emphasize enough the importance of a campus visit!
